Chinese parents learn to communicate with their children

 

Many parents look to training programs on parent-child relationships to learn how to better communicate and teach their children, especially after the "double reduction" policy took effect.

Ming Xu, 42, has three children aged three to 10. Xu felt worried and confused after her preschool teacher warned that her five-year-old second son could easily lose control, angry. Xu decided to sign up for a parent-child relationship training class.

"Joining classes, I realized that my child's emotional problems were caused by a temporary instability in the development of the area of ​​the brain responsible for controlling emotions. I was able to accept those things. children's feelings, be more patient with them and give them a calm environment," Xu said.

The program that Xu participates in, called Zhang Yiyun's Emotional Intelligence Studio, is run by Zhang Yiyun, a Chinese psychologist who focuses on researching and promoting emotional intelligence. Because of the pandemic, Zhang switched his in-person training camp to online two years ago.

"Children's Guide to Emotional Intelligence" is the main course of the program. The boot camp also offers four-day beginner training programs on parent-child communication. According to Zhang, about 200 people sign up for each show.

The four-day program covers topics such as emotional intelligence, children's comprehension, and effective communication. Learners have to pay 47 USD for each time they join the communication camp.

Most of the participants were mothers who had difficulty controlling their anger when communicating with their children. There are also some fathers who are frustrated that their children refuse to talk to their parents due to their busy schedule and lack of close connection with the family. In some cases, grandparents who want to learn how to build bridges between generations also turn to the course.

Anxiety is often a dominant factor in the lives of young Chinese parents when raising children. According to a 2016 report on the State of Parent-Child Education in China, published by the Department of Education, Beijing Normal University, 87% of parents reported having anxiety, with about 7% having anxiety. serious deposition.

As the pandemic hit and schools closed last year, parents started spending more time with their children and teaching them to study at home. Another notable change Zhang noticed was that after China's dual reduction strategy - aimed at alleviating excessive academic pressure and banning after-school tutoring - took effect, parents were concerned. more shy. Many people consult her about courses to better connect and teach their children.

"Parents have to take the main responsibility for their children's education after the double reduction policy significantly reduced the number of out-of-school training courses. So they feel more pressure than before," Zhang said.

Zuwei Qin, 43, participated in six different training programs, including an emotional assessment instruction and a four-day communication skills camp, run by Zhang and her team.

"The people around me are the main reason I sign up for such training programs. I find that no matter how successful they are, the education of their children is still their main concern," Qin said.

These training camps are new to mainland China, but they have a long history in Western countries. Dr. Thomas Gordon, an American clinical psychologist, invented the "Effective Parenting Coaching" program in the 1960s, considered by many to be the first home study skills training course. First for parents.

According to Zhang, she and her team took the idea from the West and combined it with the challenges Chinese parents face such as single-child families and pressure from college and high school entrance exams.

"We did a lot of real-world research before building our own education system for Chinese families. Designing a curriculum that doesn't fit the Chinese context won't work. ", she said.